At times, I trick myself into believing that growth and becoming wise can happen instantaneously. Or, that my desire to achieve "success" will force me to develop at a faster rate than what is natural for me.
My environment and my experiences have given me a sense of urgency that while beneficial at certain points in my life, has also caused a great deal of anxiety and stress. I always wished there was some wand I could wave or have magic words to say that would change the way I felt.
Last night, there was.
They were magic words in the sense that they were perfectly timed and unlocked a room in my mind. "You'll make mistakes and that is ok. You're human. You're young."
Previously, I had spent so much time analyzing and feeling mournful over missed opportunities that I could not see the ones in front of me or harness my own energy and potential.
No more.
Today I quote Emerson.
"Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; begin it well and serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense."
"What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us."
In 2010, I want to make meaning in whatever small ways I can and let things come as they may. I need to start having fun my way.
The List
Photography - I'll use my new cameras* to do some special projects including but not limited to: A Family Photo Album and a Brooklyn Tribute
Props to one of my inspirations Jamel Shabazz.
Writing - A chapbook perhaps? I used to be a poet *shrug
Collaborative Projects.
I think black folks are beautiful, and I want all of us to think so too.
I don't have all the answers about how to get there just yet, but I'm okay with that.
How will you contribute to the Black Aesthetic in the new millennium?
Peace!
Chapbook! Memories, for real. I've gotta get back to writing everyday myself. Not gonna call it a "New Year's Resolution", mostly b/c I never come through on those anyway.
ReplyDeleteGood stuff though. Keep the camera but lose the shorts (points @ pic).
Growth need not be rapid or revolutionary. In many cases it must be gradual to be fully understood and traslated into wisdom. Take this one day at a time and accept all the ups and downs that come with each day, growing in the process. Much success will everything.
ReplyDeleteHey Nak, I really enjoyed this entry as I think that most people can relate to it. It's important to press on and leave the past where it belongs-- in the past. I plan to contribute to the Black Aesthetique by shedding my chemically processed hair and exchanging it for something truly beautiful and genuine: my 100% natural hair.. no chemicals, dyes or European silky weave included. Thanks for the support! And keep the entries coming! Love YOU!
ReplyDeleteI love this post. I, too recently have been struggling with missed opportunities and moments. Well put :)
ReplyDelete